4 Ways You Can Help Christmas in Jail Feel More Cozy for Your Loved One

The holiday season is a time filled with anticipation, excitement, and joy for most people. However, it can be the loneliest time of year for inmates. At Christmastime, incarcerated people may feel left out as they are separated from their families and their cherished holiday traditions. Here are four ways you can help Christmas in jail feel more cozy for your loved one.

1. Celebrate with an in-person visit.

A visit from family or friends during the holiday season will mean the world to your incarcerated loved one. They may be feeling sad or lonely, and a loving familiar face can brighten their spirits. At federal prisons, in-person visits are allowed on Christmas Day, even if it does not fall on a regular visiting day. On the other hand, at state facilities, not every location will be open on December 25th. Make sure to look online or call the facility your loved one is at before planning a Christmas visit. However, visiting your loved one does not have to fall on the day of the holiday. Any visit during the season will be beneficial to both you and your inmate. Make sure to plan your visit ahead of time and look up the rules and regulations for visits in your loved one’s specific facility. If you are unsure of how to approach the visit, follow these tips for what to talk about when visiting someone in jail.

2. Keep in touch with festive phone calls.

Phone calls can be a great way to keep in contact with your incarcerated loved one during the holiday season. A majority of families live very far away from their inmate’s facility, and with all the rules and regulations, visiting during the holidays may be difficult. If you do not get the opportunity to visit in person, or are only able to do it once or twice, speaking to your loved one on the phone is the next best way to help them feel the Christmas cheer. Sharing your joys and letting your incarcerated friend or family member know they are loved can make a huge impact on their outlook for the season.

3. Send books and magazines in lieu of gifts.

A traditional part of Christmas that prisoners miss out on is gift-giving. Facilities will not accept most types of presents that you would send to a friend or family member during the holidays. However, most facilities will accept books and magazines. Books and magazines are something your inmate will be able to enjoy over time, so they can act as the gift that keeps on giving. Some tips to remember when it comes to sending books include: 

  • Do not send more than three books at a time.
  • All books must be new and soft cover (no hardcover or spiral bound for security reasons).
  • Always ship via USPS.
  • Books must come straight from the publisher (ie. Amazon).

When sending magazines to your incarcerated loved one, make sure to avoid publications with mature or sexual content, like Playboy. The facility will not accept magazines with adult themes and your inmate will not receive them. It is better to stick to more family-friendly or news-focused magazines, like Time or National Geographic.  

4. Send holiday cards and family photos.

One of the simplest yet most impactful ways to make Christmas more cozy for your incarcerated loved one is to send family photos and cards. Having family photos will help your inmate feel included in holiday traditions and remind them that they are not alone. Pelipost can help you send these holiday photos and cards to make it to your loved one in time for Christmas. Before you send, make sure to check out the guidelines for what types of photos are accepted. 

Happy Holidays!

Ready to send pictures? You can download the Pelipost app through the Apple App Store or Google Play Store.

7 Tips on What to Talk About When Visiting Someone In Jail

It can be complicated to know just what to talk about when visiting someone in jail, even if they’re a loved one that you’re very close to. However, fostering that connection with your incarcerated loved one can be very beneficial to them long-term.  Studies have shown that incarcerated men and women who maintain contact with supportive family members are more likely to succeed after their release. Before taking the trip to their facility, read our tips on what to talk about when visiting someone in jail to help you prepare. 

1. Share your joys

Sharing the positive events in your life, no matter how small, is a great place to start. Your incarcerated loved one wants to feel connected with you and with what is going on in your life. Talking about things like good grades in school, promotions at work, who is dating who, engagements, marriages, babies, etc. will help your inmate catch up with what is going on in your life. Even the small joys that might seem insignificant to you will be important to them, and make them feel as if they are still included in the outside world. 

2.  Let them know they are loved

One of the most important ways to show your inmate that they are loved is simply showing up. As most facilities are a long drive away, it means the world to them that you take the time to travel to visit. Your incarcerated loved one may feel lots of guilt and emotional baggage, and assuring them that they are worth the trouble of visiting can make them feel loved and important. 

 3. Lend a listening ear

Sharing the joys and triumphs in your life is meaningful, but listening can be equally important. The person in jail may not have an outlet for sharing personal thoughts, feelings, and experiences, and lending a comforting listening ear can make all the difference. 

4.  Be wary of future planning 

Discussing future plans can be a very touchy subject. Release dates can be very uncertain, and talking about the future may be difficult for the inmate to think about. For the most part focusing on past memories, fun moments, and joyful times together are better to discuss than plans for the future.

5.  Don’t be scared of emotions

Talking about and working through emotions is a very necessary part of visiting a loved one in jail. It can be a very difficult journey for them, with a lot of pain and sadness. Discussing how they are feeling, and maybe crying together, are good to go through in the beginning of your visit so you can end your time with the joyful things. 

6. What to avoid

The topics you should be wary about bringing up vary from person to person. Certain tough subjects like death in the family, struggles the person is facing on the outside, and other issues that the incarcerated person cannot be of any help with are best to avoid. The inmate may already be feeling helpless and disconnected from their loved ones, and do not need the additional pressure of the person on the outside’s struggles. 

7. Continue to stay in touch 

Visiting an incarcerated loved one is very valuable, but staying in touch in between visits is essential as well. Staying connected can be very beneficial to the inmate and remind them that they are loved and valued. Sending photos to your incarcerated loved ones using Pelipost can help foster your relationship with one another and stay in touch. 

Ready to send pictures? You can download the Pelipost app through the Apple App Store or Google Play Store.

Pelipost Donating 2,000 Masks

Pelipost is more than an app devoted to printing pictures for your incarcerated loved ones. We are always working to make it easier to stay connected and also to make a difference in the lives of those affected by incarceration. That’s why Pelipost is donating 2,000 masks!

The Pelipost Team packing 2000 masks.
The Pelipost Team packing 2000 masks.

Prisons and jails are being hit hard by the coronavirus because of how difficult it is to accomplish social distancing inside correctional facilities. Concerns have been circulating not just among those who are incarcerated, but also among those who work there. Cook County Jail is one of many facilities that has been hit hard by this pandemic. Pelipost has taken action to help.

Joseph Calderon (Pelipost CEO) packing masks.

Pelipost is donating 2,000 masks to the inmates and staff of Cook County Jail to help contain the spread. The masks were officially shipped on Friday, May 15.

Here at Pelipost, we are committed to doing our part in order to keep inmates and correctional staff safe during this pandemic. We are happy to be able to take part in slowing the spread of COVID-19. We’re all in this together!

Don’t forget to send your incarcerated loved ones photos! You can download the Pelipost app through the Apple App Store or Google Play Store.

Joe’s Story Outside Incarceration (Pt. 1)

Pelipost is more than just an app for sending photos to your incarcerated loved ones.  Pelipost has a story, much like your own. We are so excited to share our story with you in our new PeliPeople series! This is part one of Joe’s Story Outside Incarceration. (Read about Becky’s Story Inside Incarceration here)

. . .

“I didn’t know what the hell to do.  It wasn’t just my mom who’d be doing time, but me as well.  We were officially in the system together. ”

-Joe Calderon

Growing up in San Diego in the 1980’s the Calderon family lived the picturesque American Dream.  Happy marriage, good careers, new cars, and a beautiful home. In January of 1989, they joyfully welcomed their first child, Joseph into their lives.  Sadly, the joys of parenthood became shattered a month after Joseph was born, Becky received a terminal cancer diagnosis. Doctors told her she would be lucky to live to see me turn 5. 

Childhood Before Incarceration

Toddler Joe. Joe's Story Outside Incarceration
Toddler Joe & his parents. Joe’s Story Outside Incarceration

As my mom fought her way through surgeries, chemo, and intense radiation, she decided to devote what time she had remaining to provide me with the best childhood she could offer. It was full of fun, birthday parties, family vacations, playing sports, and lots of love.

Sadly, as the years passed, life’s struggles took a toll on my family. This included financial hardships, losing our home during the Great Recession, and the collapse of my parents’ 21-year marriage. On top of that, my mom’s legal troubles lead her to a battle with alcoholism as she tried to drink her circumstances away. 

Mom Sentenced to Prison

In October 2010, our family endured the ultimate hardship. My mom (Becky) arrived to a San Diego courthouse for what she believed would be a sentencing of house arrest only to find out she wouldn’t be returning home. Her lawyer promised she would receive a lenient sentencing because she had never been in trouble before and she committed a “white-collared crime”.  To our shock and surprise, the Judge sentenced her to 3 years in prison and ordered her immediately incarcerated. On the outside, I was in complete disbelief that my mom was really going to prison.

I was away at college and had little knowledge of the legal system. I wasn’t expecting my mom to end up in prison, especially before I could say goodbye, give her a big hug, and tell her it was going to be okay.

Families End Up In The Prison System Together

Joe and Becky during Visitation. Joe's Story Outside Incarceration
Joe and Becky during Visitation. Joe’s Story Outside Incarceration

My world instantly changed and I felt an ENORMOUS amount of pressure and stress.  I didn’t know what the hell to do. It wasn’t just my mom who’d be doing time, but me as well.  We were officially in the system together. I literally woke up one day with everything being “normal”and going to bed with my world completely in chaos. 

Shortly after going into custody, they relocated my mom to California’s Central Women’s Facility in Chowchilla CA (8 hours away). Her cancer had returned while incarcerated and she required a facility with a full medical ward to continue her treatment. This was the beginning of one of the hardest challenges my mom and I would ever endure…

Want to read more about Joseph’s Story Outside Incarceration? Sign-up for the Pelipost email newsletter! You will first to be to notified once we release the next part of our story soon!

Don’t forget to send your incarcerated loved ones photos this holiday season! You can download the Pelipost app through the Apple App Store or Google Play Store.