The Bigger Picture: Validation

Pelipost is more than an app devoted to printing pictures for your incarcerated loved ones. We believe in the importance of family reintegration far exceeds the physical product in hand. REMAINING CONNECTED is the BIGGER PICTURE. 

In this two-part blog series we sat down with our very own co-founder, Becky Calderon, to explore the significant importance PRINTED photos had while incarcerated. 

“You feel like a failure at the time, you know your story has more to offer. You have to constantly remind yourself that prison doesn’t define my worth.”

– Becky Calderon

LIVING FOR PRISON MAIL CALL

When you’re in prison, all you have is time. You almost forget that life exists. You block it all out. You see the fences, you see the walls. You cope as best you can. With that said, there was one thing that kept us all rooted in hope for the future. MAIL CALL. We would LIVE FOR MAIL CALL. This is how we remained connected and informed with the world outside of our cell. We were all in prison for different reasons but unified by this longing to know we were more than our worst mistakes.

Letters were cherished but to receive an envelope with photos was the ultimate prize. Even just feeling the outside ridges of the envelope and knowing there was photos inside brought so much emotion… It’s hard to describe in words. I guess you could say, there was an unspoken understanding in there. We all simply longed for VALIDATION. Printed photos allowed our stories outside to come to life. We shared them, we celebrated, we mourned, we anticipated them with great excitement. It reminded us we are more than our current situation. We once had lives, passions, families, relationships, hobbies, skills, interests, stories that defined us outside of the prison walls. We are missed and treasured by others awaiting our release. 

CELEBRATING IN PRISON 

I shared a cell with 8 women, lovingly referred to as ‘cellies’. We each had different stories and reasons for their incarceration. Since we were in a maximum security facility… some stories were harder than others. One was an older woman. Her daughter had just given birth to her first grandchild. She was elated with the news and would beg for pictures of the new baby she would meet in the years to come. The new mom was so busy readjusting and overwhelmed with this new life that it took her so long to finally find the time to send her mom photos. When that day came…. We CELEBRATED alongside our cellie with great pride! It was as if the child’s arrival had just happened all over again for the first time.

MOURNING IN PRISON 

There was also a younger woman who had about 7 years remaining on her sentence. Her mother would come often and visit with her in the beginning of her sentence. She was older and unfortunately suffered a heart-related issue and wasn’t able to travel easily after that. This cellie LIVED for her mother’s visits. Once the mother’s visits stopped you can imagine how heartbreaking it was to her spirit. She would plead with her siblings… ‘send me pictures of MOM… I just want to see her face and know she’s alright’. I remember thinking ‘send this girl photos of her mother, she may not be alive when she gets out of here’. I hurt so badly for her. As a mother, I was fighting cancer inside the prison walls and understood the fear of leaving my son in an immediate way. 

VALUE YOUR INCARCERATED LOVED ONES

If you want your incarcerated loved ones to fight the staggering statistics of recidivism… INCLUDE THEM IN THEIR STORIES. VALIDATE their worth (outside of their poor choices). There was a cellie who had three children and five years remaining on her sentence. The problem was she kept getting into more and more trouble inside. I kept thinking ‘Don’t you even want to get out for your children?’ To be fair, she was never in her children’s lives to begin with… I used to pray that her family would include her in those kids lives and send her photos of them growing up. If only she communicated with them a little more often, I wonder if that wouldn’t have given her greater  purpose and hope for reconciling those relationships. 

PRINTED  PHOTOS GIVE HOPE

Sometimes customers assume we are disconnected from their stories and the struggles they face. I make sure to remind them of my own story and extend grace and understanding because incarceration is just so painful on so many levels. We care because WE KNOW HOW VITAL PHOTOS ARE in there! I want to bring that joy and validation because I felt that joy firsthand. When I finally got the picture of Joseph and that DAMN CAR (his first new car)… I was so happy! It plays such a huge part of our story. Little did we know at the time how incredible that printed photo would be to the future. Because of that photo, because of our separation, because of my worst mistakes… We now have this beautiful service impacting the lives of hundreds of thousands of families with incarcerated loved ones across the United States. 

That being said, the impact is tangible and it feels so good. We have customers that have sent over 70 orders during these past three years. To read their notes… ‘Thank you so much for your service. He’s out. We’re not going to need you anymore.’ This is why we do what we do with such pride and dedication to our customers. We see how powerfully important our service is to the future reintegration process of their loved ones.

Don’t forget to send your incarcerated loved ones photos this holiday season! You can download the Pelipost app through the Apple App Store or Google Play Store.

14 Replies to “The Bigger Picture: Validation”

  1. Thank you for doing this i feel more connected to my son and share pics of his son regularly so he can see him growing up . Also i send whats up on facebook of his friends and their kids . Keeps him in touch.

  2. Omg The Stories Are So Beautiful And Touches My Heart. IWll Be 59 Years Old Feb 18 My Older Son Is Lock Down he’s 41 He Is My First Love He Taught Me What Love Was About how I Had Someone Who depends on Me He Was A Good Son He Made Bad Choices he was and Is respectful and always been Very KIND To Me I Love him to Life he Has 8 More years he has A Son 21 years old a Daughter bout to be 26 Dec 21 they Love there Daddy and is in His Life I have been with my son from day one I don’t agree with his wrong doing But he’s my Child I Love My Children unconditional he has a sister my best friend she is 37 His Young brother is 34 they are close we stick together my 34 year old JayJay can’t go see his brother Terrence it’s been almost 10 year o how that affects him he would ride by and say hey bro I’m here I Love you My Young son JayJay was in the street doing drugs he took weed in the jail so they want let him see his brother but I want ever give up that bothers my Son that he can’t see his brother my daughter and I go see him when we can and it bothers me like heck I can’t see him he is 6 hours away I see him every Thanksgiving and Christmas since he been there now I can’t I pray they send him back home close I make sure I send him photos as much as I can he got 1o today I try to keep him updated on what’s going on with our families and let him know we Love him and I want give up on him ever he’s my heart so Yes thank you for doing this for people who need this really bad it good to know this is here for me when I need it I Miss my Son EVERYDAY!! He always in my heart and thoughts Thank You❤️

    1. We know how difficult it can be to make it to visitation especially when they are taken so far from home. All of your love and support is definitely appreciated. A strong support system makes such a difference. We’re happy we can keep you and your son connected.

  3. thanks so much for sharing this because ive really been needing an more reliable to connect to my incarcerated love and not by paper because he really needs to know everything I need to say to him.

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